Jenny’s Pennies

So, this week we saw the verdict in a very high profile rape case here in Sweden. (Read about it: BBC, the Local 1, the Local 2, the Local 3, the Local 4, the Local 5, the Local 6).

Short recap: Opera singer Tito Beltran gets two years in prison for rape. The court was unanimous in its decision. The rape took place in 1999, during a concert tour involving some of Sweden’s most well-know artists. The victim was the 18 year old nanny of one of the other artists.

Much debate has ensued, some people hail the unanimous verdict as being very clear and giving courage to other victims of sexual violence to report the crime to the police. Others say that there is a lack of evidence, and that the crime took place too long time ago (it wasn’t reported until last year). Tito Beltran himself says that the accusations are false and that he is the subject of a conspiracy. It was reported today that he will appeal. The verdict is not based on any physical evidence, but on the credibility of the injured party and the witnesses - very rare in rape cases.

In the public debate being held at internet forums, blogs and the discussion forums at big media outlets, the loudest people seems to be the one that says “oh watch out all men, make sure to get a signed and witnessed consent form from any woman you have sex with because now you can end up in jail just because you pissed her off.”

Besides the inherent misogyny in such remarks, they are blatantly false (it is not easy to be convicted of rape, and I am not saying that it should: we should of course uphold the standards of a fair justice system for all crimes). But what also bugs me in the whole media frenzy about this case is that the victim seems nowhere to be seen. In public debates about crime and criminal justice, you always hear “think of the victim!” and “why all the regard for the perpetrator?”. But in rape cases, this often seems to shift. This of course has partly to do with the fact that rape involves a sexual act, and that rape is difficult in that the crime often takes place in private, the perpetrator not seldom being someone the victims knows. This of course creates special circumstances.
But still…

Granted, I haven’t followed this case too closely (most of the reporting seems to have been done in the tabloids, which of course are delighted over a rape case involving some of Sweden’s most well-known artists with elements of conspiracies and racism). But the victim has been surprisingly absent from the reporting. If it is done with regard to her privacy and out of respect for her, that is fine, but I suspect that is not the case. But as I said, I haven’t read all the reporting.

But when it comes to the “do I need to record her on my cell phone when she says she wants to have sex with me?” and “what if she changes your mind midway?” type debate, I really don’t see how people like this resonate. Or how they have sex, for that matter. I mean, don’t you communicate with your partner? If your partner signals that no, I don’t want this anymore, you fucking stop what you’re doing (unless you’re involved in BDSM power play but then you settle things like this beforehand with safe words and such) and communicate. If you talk about it and listen to each other respectfully I think there is very little chance that the woman will run off the next day and report you for rape, even though she “changed her mind”. I know in the world of some people evil “feminazis” do this all the time to throw all the men in jail, but out in the real world, communication and respect goes a very long way and eliminates the need for signed consent forms and recorded “yes I want to do that”-messages. In the words of Portly Dyke at Shakesville:

If, at any time, you perceive that your partner looks uncomfortable, apathetic, disinterested/disengaged about what’s going on, stop and ask them questions like: “Are you enjoying this? Is there something else you want?”, etc.. Then listen to their responses and take creative, consensual action on what you hear. I suppose that having apathetic, listless sex may be a turn-on for some people, but if you want to hear that resounding and enthusiastic consent (YES! YES! YES! over and over for hours without interruption), then continuing without enthusiastic response maybe isn’t such a great strategy in terms of building your sexual mojo.

Read the whole thing!
(And yes, in this post I take it for granted that the perpetrator is male and the victim female. I am aware that this is of course not always the case.)

This entry was posted on Friday, February 15th, 2008 at 11:55 pm and is filed under Crime, Sexual assault, Sweden. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.