Jenny’s Pennies

Today, many bloggers are taking part in the Blog Against Sexual Violence day. I know it’s an American event (as is this), but sexual violence is something which affects people all over the world, so I decided to participate from my side of the pond.

On the one side of the spectrum of why we need to raise awareness about sexual violence is this.

A senior BNP leader with a strong chance of winning a seat in the London Assembly next month has written that rape is a “myth” and that “some women are like gongs - they need to be struck regularly.”

The Standard can reveal that Nick Eriksen, the BNP’s London organiser and the second-highest candidate on its list for the Assembly, is the author of “Sir John Bull,” a notorious far-Right blog which has regularly advocated hatred and abuse against women. The disclosure will be a serious blow to the BNP’s hopes of London electoral success.

On 24 August 2005, Mr Eriksen wrote: “I’ve never understood why so many men have allowed themselves to be brainwashed by the feminazi myth machine into believing that rape is such a serious crime … Rape is simply sex. Women enjoy sex, so rape cannot be such a terrible physical ordeal.

“To suggest that rape, when conducted without violence, is a serious crime is like suggesting that forcefeeding a woman chocolate cake is a heinous offence. A woman would be more inconvenienced by having her handbag snatched.

“The demonisation of rape is all part of the feminazi desire to obtain power and mastery over men. Men who go along with the rape myth are either morons or traitors.”

(Emphasis mine.) Eriksen is now out of the race.

Some people say that we should not give any publicity to stuff like this, that parties like the British National Party (BNP), which is a disgusting racism-homophobia-misogyny trifecta, is living off controversy and headlines like this. That it just feeds to their rhetoric of being “misunderstood”, “taken out of context” and “silenced”. Eriksen himself has said that he was only “trying to create debate and discussion”.

But Eriksen was running for a political office, he wanted to represent people. And to ignore the hate he was spewing on his blog (even if it was three years ago) - no, we shouldn’t do that. Don’t feed the trolls and all, but if that troll is going to hold a political position, we should damn well call them out on it. You know: The only thing necessary for the persistence of evil is for enough good people to do nothing.

You know, Eriksen’s views aren’t mainstream. But on the other side of the spectrum on why it is important to talk about this stuff are those who say that “yes, sexual assault is horrific and terrible, but…” (what was she doing walking alone at 3 a.m.?; she had sex with the guy previously; why was she acting so flirtatious?; she was a stripper, it comes with the trade; he was her boyfriend so was it really rape; there was no penetration so it wasn’t too bad; etc. etc.).

Yes, I think it is a spectrum. That views like Eriksen’s cannot be separated from the “that’s horrible, but…”-position. Rape apologism is all around. And it’s being spread by women and men alike.

A commenter over at the Curvature, Feminist Avatar, said something that I think is really true:

I think that women often blame rape victims, because that means that rape is something that can be controlled. It is a scary realisation to think that you cannot control whether or not some man chooses to have sex with you. For many women’s peace of mind, they would rather hold onto an idea that that sort of thing happens to ‘other’ people; people who then need to be defined.

I was sexually assaulted once. No it wasn’t rape. But it was definitely sexual assault, and rape was not far away. I’m not telling the details - and I’m actually shaking right now and wondering whether I should really type this. I feel guilty. But I decide to break the silence. I haven’t told anyone and now I’m telling the world.
If someone else would tell the story of the sexual assault that happened to me, I wouldn’t for a moment suggest that she was to blame, but yet I am feeling guilty and ashamed. That’s how deeply ingrained victim-blaming is in us. In me. Typing this makes me feel dirty. It feels as if I am trivializing the feelings and suffering of those “real victims” out there when I am presenting myself as one of them. My rationality and my feminist mind tells me that I have the right to own my feelings and experiences, that the blame rests solely somewhere else. But inside me is a nagging voice that says that I brought it on myself, that it wasn’t so bad, that I should have known better, that asks “how could I be so stupid and naive?”. I hear it now as well, telling me that I’m making too big a deal out of it. That I have a reason to feel dirty. It’s telling me to press the delete button. But today, I’m letting my rational and feminist mind win. I am not being silenced by myself any longer.

———————————-
PS. I really think you should visit Abyss2Hope who is organizing the whole Blog against sexual violence effort. Thanks for all your work Marcella!

This entry was posted on Thursday, April 3rd, 2008 at 7:47 pm and is filed under Human rights, International, Sex and sexuality, Sexual assault, Violence against women. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.